Teri

On the first day of signing

My tenant gave to me:

1. And the last month’s paid up front
2. Two rental applications
3. Three pay stubs
4. Four “please pick me’s”
5. Five weeks security deposit
6. Six figure income
7. Seven previous addresses
8. Eight hundred credit score
9. Nine months to retirement
10. Ten years with one employer
11. Eleven days to move-in
12. Twelve month’s lease signed

Warm holiday wishes to all of you at Renting Authority and thanks for the fun holiday sing-a-long.

April

#1 )No Hope for receiving, any form of Judgment, to repair the damages tenants did to me!

#2) No new Carpets……..from the cigarette butt’s put out on it………………….

#3) No new un-broken windows………from the kid’s BB-gun shots…………….

#4) No new un-clogged toilet system!!! From the stuff they jammed down it………………

#5).No new kitchen cabinets, without the wholes kicked through them!……………………

#6) No gapping rips, from the skateboarding, on the new lin-ol-e-um!!……………………..

#7) No holes in the walls repaired, no fresh paint……………………………………………….

#8) No back rent…………………………………………………………………………………………….

#9)No rent money for the illegal woman he brought in with the unlawful detainer His-tor-y!!!!!!!

#10) No un -broken lease agreement

#11)no paid up promise

#12) And absolutely no re-imburse-ment for the Lawyer and any of the le—-galllllllllll feeeeeeeeeee’s!!

P.S. This is a true story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!